arrow14 Comments
  1. who dis?!
    Apr 02 - 10:04 am

    I always knew you were on my side, that beneath all the hate there was a glimmer of intelligence in your oversized head. Welcome to the outside of the closet.

    Not to change the subject, but “old lady friend” Simmons? Aren’t you a married man now?

  2. Flint from Michigan
    Apr 02 - 10:13 am

    Heh thanks for the NYTimes paywall dodging tips link.

    I’m proud of you Doug, helping lonely old ladies cross the information superhighway like that. Let me guess, you didn’t pressure her to spring for the 32 gigger? The question is, would you have done that if Apple gave you a cut of referral sales or are you an honest man?

    But what’s with you and not being able to write a single article (I checked) without taking a shot at either Microsoft or AT&T? Ahh whatever, it’s okay. Like punch the monkey banners my mind is just starting to filter that crap out of your writing, which is good, otherwise I’d have coded up some PHP to let users conceal all your articles and paid your boss however much it took to install it. Seriously, I’ve thought about doing that multiple times.

    So, did you jailbreak it for her so she could tether and install Flash or did you manage to go stock this time?

  3. Doug Smith
    Apr 02 - 10:39 am

    I read somewhere NYTimes is going to start charging for their content. I am not against publications charging for their content, it’s just that I’m not buyin. To many other ways to get news for free.

  4. Doug Simmons
    Apr 02 - 10:44 am

    Yeah you might feel differently if it were Fox News Print Edition…

    And one of the ways to sort of get it for free, btw, is by already being a home delivery subscriber, which makes this less unreasonable as there are a lot of those types.

    The good thing about this is that if the Times can demonstrate that such a pay model for such a publication were a viable maneuver to stay afloat in that business, that’s very valuable information to the other newspapers that are failing left and right.

    This is a wild crazy guess but I think that the Times, as far as these tricks go, won’t make too big an effort to prevent people from cheating the system. I mean, come on, how hard could that be.

    Also, this.

  5. Doug Simmons
    Apr 02 - 12:45 pm

    BRYAN B: Good advice, I should do that. However I did set her up with everything I picture her wanting to use with a credit card — Amazon, Apple, Financial Times. Though she’s getting the hang of typing, banging in the credit card number for her, I picture her not doing that. But still all old timers (btw just pulled her up on wikipedia, 81 years in a few months — that compounded with her bad health, you get the idea) running around the web unchaperoned need the identity theft talk. For her, passwords once the Remember Mes on everything timeout on her.

    Remembering a credit card number at 81 and managing to dive right into a gadget like this after a life of no computers, even with an awesome escort, that’s impressive. Hope I don’t live that long because judging by how hard it is for me to remember names when meeting people, well, .. I guess it won’t be too bad as I’ll get to forget my Windows Mobile horrors. Oh, the horror.

    ktdan1: Yes, and I’m finally beginning to get comfortable enough here to come out of my shell a bit and reveal some of those sides, maybe one or two of which, like this one, you’ll find tolerable. Not to ditch the helping old ladies side I’ve unveiled here but I’m actually super awesome in general.

    Here’s a mind-effer for you: Though I’m working to correct this, I own more Microsoft stock than Google. I also managed to find a woman who can put up with me every single day. That’s some twilight zone out of left field shit for you, no?

    In contrast, this is probably not much of a mind-effer to you: I’m an ass man.

    … because people keep telling me Hey Doug, you’re an ass, man!

  6. BRYAN B
    Apr 02 - 11:18 am

    While I applaud your actions concerning her education concerning the device, you also need to educate her about the pit falls of using her credit card online. The elderly are prime targets for the lowlifes out there.
    Anarticlel was recently posted byThreat postt about Itunesspecificallyy, it stated 40% of in-app purchases werefraudulentt
    Now I donbelieveive any of the other online services are any safer, but she needs to know about the pitfalls. Make sure she keep an eye on any accounts that require a credit card weather it is Itunes, the Wall StreJournalnal or what ever

  7. ktdan1
    Apr 02 - 12:08 pm

    Good job on the artical, some times simplier is better. Can there be another side to doug?

  8. BRYAN B
    Apr 02 - 1:22 pm


    It’s not a matter of her using her card any more, it’s a matter of the sites which store her info being hacked and her information being changed.

  9. Doug Simmons
    Apr 02 - 1:45 pm

    Yup. At first I thought Oh come on, we’re talking about Apple and Amazon, then I realized that not too long ago Apple/AT&T’s servers were significantly compromised. All the time. Even was recently compromised with, of all things, an SQL injection. Apache too, security sites…

    Man I could really live without these aye-holes whose contributions to the world include writing and unleashing things specifically that involve identity theft. Pop-ups and nuiscance-ware, that I can blame on Microsoft and write off as contributing to the anti-hacking industry and ultimately better software, but identity theft stuff I just don’t get.

    People who are capable of writing code (or just manipulating people effectively) that results in a massive botnet running around and quietly popping in some javascript into sites like this (it happened once) that install … argh .. people who do that are clearly brilliant and gifted and could easily become very successful by less evil means, ways that actually contribute utility to the world, yet they go the scumbag route.

    I think it’s a perfect storm combination of a mood disorder or something that results in insomnia with these people staying up all night working madly on their botnets when no one else is awake to go play xbox or beer pong with them and nothing good is on TV, plus a personality disorder, sociopathological, antisocial or something lighter like conduct disorder, whereby this activity checks out through their ethical filter.

    Or they just live in a shit country where even with these skills you just can’t make it without stealing.

    What a pain in the ass it is when you find out you’re a victim. Gotta deal with credit cards, maybe the government, banks, credit rating agencies — it can really put a damper on your day and it happens all the damn time. I’ve managed to avoid it (I don’t even have a credit card), my old man however could have used a few lectures along the lines of what you described as this happened to him at least twice.

    Clever sons of bitches.

  10. Mobility Digest
    Apr 02 - 3:59 pm

    The Old Lady and the iPad

  11. Android News
    Apr 02 - 5:47 pm

    From News/Blogs: The Old Lady and the iPad: … Motorola (79), Backflip (1), Droid (10), Droid 2 (9), D… #android

  12. erdoke
    Apr 04 - 3:36 am

    Actually, you can do without a credit card if you register for the App Store through “buying” a free app.

  13. Mr Windows
    Apr 04 - 1:10 pm

    HP has a free print app for use with some of their wireless DeskJets/OfficeJets. Epson has one, too.
    As far as the wobbles, I’d get one of those bedside laptop stands. Should work well.

  14. George
    May 31 - 7:11 am

    If your friend is having trouble using the trackball then you could try using a keyboard emulator to map left mouse button and trackball etc to a games controller. For example have some keys and such mapped to an xbox controller for the purpose of more easily playing steam games that don’t have native controller support. a good program to try for this is joytokey, its not very intuitive but i found it useful, just my two cents.


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