There’s no effing way that Ballmer and Elop are using a Windows Phone to take calls. Seriously, you can’t be on a damn phone call when an email comes in because the notification will give you the shakes. It’s a series of three beeps but the last one is about ten times louder than the voice of the person you’re talking to on the phone. The first sounds are just warning shots so you know you need to move your ear from the phone or lose your hearing.

Yeah, made the mistake of taking a call on my Lumia midday today when emails were flying and I almost lost it…

Unobtrusive notification – helpful. Ear numbing notification – harmful. I don’t get how this occurs if the people in Redmond are using these things.


  1. Who the hell leaves email notification on? And, by that token, who doesn’t set up the notification tones BEFORE using the phone? Don’t blame MS for your stupidity…

    • Obviously I know how to turn them off…look at the image I used. I have multiple email accounts on my phone. I don’t leave it on vibrate and leave the phone in my pocket. I care about my nuts too much for that.
      The problem is that you can’t control the volume of the notification during a call. It is crazy loud. And every time I get a phone call I’m not silencing sounds before picking up a call. That’s the phones job not mine and something other OSes can do. Hell the fact I can’t set different tones for different accounts still means notifications are pre-WM…

  2. I have to say, my email notification is off and I don’t know many people who have it on… But… In David’s defense, this is not only the case with email notifications. Text and toast notification sounds are just as annoying and follow the same “three gun salute” pattern… I mean, seriously, one beep is enough… I totally agree with him.

  3. I agree with DavidK, and I don’t understand why people are giving him a hard time. The notifications are murder. I have my e-mail notifications on because I use my phone as a communications device. I receive lots of e-mail throughout the day and if away from my desk I want to know when one arrives so that I can respond to it. Also, my calls forward from my desk to my cell if I don’t answer, so I get plenty of calls and e-mails at the same time.

    If you don’t use your phone for business, I guess you could live without the notifications and check e-mail whenever you feel like it.

    Finally, why do so many of you think the way you use your phone is the only right way and decide that others are ‘beginners’ or stupid? Bunch of self-important schmucks if you ask me…

  4. Completely forgot about this. Agree 100%. Infuriating to me when I get a text and this happens, sooooo stupid and pointless. Chalk this up with the zero auto rotate, minimum brightness control.

    Anyone attacking David about this is either an idiot themselves or has no friends and never gets notifications so it’s not an issue. There, how’s that for juvenile attacking? At least in defending a person here people! The mentality of defending a multi-billion dollar company is just so ridiculous I can’t comprehend it and is why a OS can be in a mature state and still have giant flaws such as this.

    While we are at it can I add that the cursor text selection in WP is so bad it’s unusable in situations, or will i get jumped on like I’m some kind of moron who doesn’t know how to judge whether or not a “tool” works well for me or not? It’s ok to like something overall but proclaim it’s shortcomings, that’s how things improve. And let me just say, WP must improve if it wants traction.

    I went back and used both the android marketplace and ios…haha and let me tell you, the WP marketplace is AWFUL. Search is worthless and the design is about as unhelpful as you can get. Do i turn a blind eye and defend it like its my religion just because is still prefer the platform over anything else? Of course not.

  5. People turn off email notifications? I’ve always left them on. Otherwise I wouldn’t know if I got a work email that needed to be addressed urgently. I see people with iPhones that make that distinctive email sound all the time, so I thought that was normal to have it on?

  6. Simple solution, connect with EDGE or CDMA, problem solved! For many Verizon Windows Phones you don’t even have to do anything to switch to CDMA. And because of how optimized Windows Phone is, you won’t even notice that you’re on 2G, just look at the fruity tiles. The fruity, hypnotic tiles.

  7. I agree that the notification sounds are primitive in WP. WinMo was better, particularly when nodded a bit. This is an everyday, all day issue that should be solved asap.

    In the meantime, figure out the least objectionable notifications, and turn the volume down, using vibrate to ensure you don’t miss them when its in your pocket.

    If you stop putting it in your underwear the vibrator should bother your sensitive wedding tackle. Or, put it IN underwear and learn to enjoy it!

  8. World, just shuddup. David knows how to screw around WP. The only thing I think the alcohol level that could have been controlling him while he posted this lame0 article.

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