Newegg Only

After a long clip of consumer celibacy, I decided to hit up Newegg and splurge and drop a grand on the mother of all monitors, even though I’m already living beyond my means, according to my tax guy.

Days went by, no package. Usually things show up from Newegg the next day on free shipping. Uh oh.

So I pull up the UPS tracking page: My precious monitor went to NYC! I once lived in NYC, now I’m in Connecticut. No call or forwarding of the package from a good Samaritan in my old building. That baby’s gone.

Listen, if it were you the reader who snatched it, enjoy, and at the least get a video card that can handle its 4096×2160 60hz resolution, okay buddy?

Forlorn and crestfallen, in desperation I figured I’d try my luck in Newegg’s Live Chat thing which connected me to a presumably-lovely Vivian Z. And you know what Vivian said? “No problem Mr. Simmons, we’ll send you another screen to your corrected address, and on the house. Have a great weekend!”

Wow. I love you Newegg, and you too Vivian Z. In joyful celebration, I just ordered a joystick from you. Oh, and some wifi antennas, always wondered if they did anything.

Doug Simmons