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Verizon: Get your Android terminology straight for your customer’s sake.

Hello everyone.  This will be an Adventures at Best Buy kind of thing for you.  Guy calls in (cause I answer phones for the entire store) and says “Do you guys have the new Droid?”  So I assumed what every English speaking person does when the term “new” is used and default to the most recent “Droid” I know of which is this:

For the uninitiated and the customer’s education this is Motorola’s second Droid phone known as the Droid Shadow.  Motorola has released several devices that run the Android Operating System, including this abortion candidate, all of which are entirely different.  To give faith in general common sense the benefit of the doubt I thought to myself that maybe his misappropriation of the term was just limited to him and his knowledge of the Android Operating System, so by this logic and assuming he simply meant the newest one to hit the market I asked if he was looking for the HTC Evo or maybe even that other half-assed attempt at Android by my baselessly preferred carrier of choice.  I was, again, wrong.  This leads me to my establishment of blame.  The customer was looking for the HTC Incredible.  This is Verizon’s most recent Android phone, aggressively advertised as a “Droid”.  This customers confusion was due to nothing short of an immensely lazy marketing campaign.  So in order to establish in a clear manner that this was not the customer’s fault in any way I have prepared the following message for Verizon (formerly known as Verizon Wireless.)

To Verizon,

   Clean your shit up so I don’t have to deal with it!  Help your customers out and use consistent terminology to industry standards and maybe spend more than a 5th grader’s lunch money on the creative peoples in your marketing department.  Otherwise continue to kick-ass despite a reportedly slower network while the big blue fruit loving behemoth grinds to a halt under the weight of phones and pads for people who like to buy functionally crippled devices due to restrictive software in vain attempts to be trendy while at the same time forcing me to abandon almost a decade of customer loyaltly bargaining leverage when dealing with their customer service in order to get a decently spec’d phone that doesn’t link any of my credit cards directly with Steve Jobs retirement/global domination fund. 

ATT Customer and Electronics Support Employee

Matt Anderson

That is all.

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